Spring Not Just an Opener

I attended the dreadful Opener of Vanderhag where I saw people I did not care to see, at a place I did not care to be at, however my little minxie was going to be present so I knew I would as well. There I was; immaculate beyond their comprehension, surrounded by hags wearing their nouveau baubles and gossiping about lesser hags and their baubles when I see the Vanderhag make a beeline for my little cousin. It appears that Elyce and the hag have an understanding that the minor son is hers for the taking and the poor boy will have his skateboard taken away before he can say I do! I wondered how long it was before they noticed him in the corner lusting after his half sister in an incestuous disgrace. Oh the exquisite pain of discovering your nubile crush is actually your sister after twenty odd years. Life can be so utterly divine in its inexplicable cruelty as I discovered her capricious nature this evening.

There I was perfection, searching for my minxie when to my greatest delight I discovered her, alone, so beautifully and unguardedly alone. I ever so carefully approached until I had her in an inescapable position, how my heart fluttered at her alarm at the sound of my whisper in her ear. It was a pleasure so consuming it almost contained the divine to see her neck quiver and her lips tighten when my voice caressed her skin. I wanted to lick and bite her until she screamed into my mouth but instead I made social niceties, after all I am a gentleman first and a beast second.

Just as I was about to guide my princess into a close embrace on the dance floor the heavens opened up and the gods intervened in a most unsatisfactory way. I appear to have been thwarted once again by the idiot meatnut from the restaurant even though he was not dressed in his usual jackanapes fashion he still looked like borrowed wares. You can take the parents from the wrong side of the tracks but their offspring eventually wander back there. In his best rough nut fashion he dragged my lovely off and submitted her to the torture of him stomping around the dance floor under the guise of social interaction. To my amazement instead of looking adoringly at her rescuer she appeared to be reading him the riot act. Oh my delightful minxie if I was to have ever considered reassessing my lust for you this display has me even more determined to ravish your body and soul, you will be mine.

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