There Once was a Marriage

I amused myself greatly today in ways that would not be apparent to the outside world for I had created a reason for apeboy and his sidekick to have a meeting with Lynx and then chose a notorious black spot for their rendezvous. I knew that once they would be unable to receive any calls they needed to be delayed so I instructed dear Lynx to keep them there for at least twelve hours. I envisioned minxie cursing the phones as she attempted to reach apeboy for the entire day and I wondered when she would clue onto what was really happening, for she appears to be rather obtuse to her reality right now. Perhaps her recent grief has kept her from acknowledging her truth but one would think the ogre of a housekeeper would have enlightened her by now!

Since I was unable to be directly privy to their phone conversations I went to town to have lunch at the establishment of ape boy's mother and enjoy the local gossip. There the Sedero harridan was, in her wrong side of the tracks glory, enjoying the attentions of none other than Mr. Porn himself— Mr. Bianca Sangu. She twittered and flittered like some demented schoolgirl while he lapped up being socially acceptable in a very public manner, you can take the big hair off the girl but the lack of brain matter remains. How on earth did she manage to make millions by being so obvious and coy I will never understand—oh but wait, I forgot that she carries the testes of those she vanquishes in her pocket. I watched their saccharine parade for as long as my stomach could stand then I decided that perhaps I would intervene and end this travesty as it was interfering with my lunch.

I had not seen my sister for several days since her little spat, the end of the Jago affair and I assumed that once returned to the family nest he would resume whatever he did with the Vanderhag. Imagine how surprised I was upon passing the building which housed our executive suites to discover my sister turning into the underground car park and it was a natural course for me to follow her as I am not one to allow anything to pass by unnoted. I parked on the other side of the car park and noted a familiar red Mercedes drive up and I needed no telling that it was the Vandersop off to have a tryst with my sister.

Now I do not mind trysts, in fact my entire life has been built upon the tryst but my sister was publicly humiliated by the wine moron and here she is allowing their affair to continue? This would not do, I considered the myriad of ways to punish him and realised that if the consumption of his precious fluff of a daughter did not move him, what would? Then I thought of course it had to be the son, the heir apparent the one who would run the winery while daddy retired to grow cabbages or whatever wine barons do. The only thing of interest the son had was the delicious confection of a fiancé and that is when I decided their wedding could never be as one does not leave a Dubois unless it’s in a very long wooden box.

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